"The human brain is a wonderful thing. It starts working the moment you are born and never stops until you stand up to speak in public."

"Most American children suffer too much mother and too little father."

"The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others."

"We need to remember that there's no such thing as a 'self-made man' or a 'self-made woman.' We are all made by each other."

"The makers of the game Monopoly have announced they're coming out with a female version of the game called Miss Monopoly. It's just like regular Monopoly but when you pass go you only get $158. And th…"