"What's right is what's left if you do everything else wrong."

"I'm not a religious person, but I'm a spiritual person. I believe in a higher power."

"The only reason Mickey Mouse has four fingers is because he can’t pick up a check."

"I'm not afraid of death, but I'm afraid of dying."

"If you are ever in trouble, don't scream, don't cry, just hit them in the head with a frying pan."