"I love my wife, but sometimes I want to take a picture of her and send it to the police with a caption: 'Have you seen this woman? She's driving me crazy!'"

"I think the human brain is a wonderful thing. It starts working the moment you are born and never stops until you stand up to speak in public."

"I'm a big fan of making people laugh. It's the best feeling in the world."

"I think the greatest thing in life is to be able to make people laugh."

"I'm a big believer in the power of positive thinking."