"Feminists say that men are a bunch of pigs. Well, I don't know about that, but I do know that pigs are pretty smart animals. So, maybe that's a compliment?"

"I'm not a fan of anything that requires me to wear pants."

"The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music."

"I'm not a leader. I'm just a guy who has a lot of followers."

"Religion is sort of like a lift in your shoes. If it makes you feel better, fine. Just don't ask me to wear your shoes."