"I'm always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I'm listening to it."

"Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity."

"I'm not a fan of political correctness. I think it's a way of shutting people up."

"I'm not a sociopath. I just don't care about other people's feelings."

"I'm not a pessimist. I'm a realist. I just think the world is a fucked-up place."